“Be Your Specialist” Topic (Be aware of your feelings before handling the child )Series – 7

Recognizing and handling both our feelings and those of others. Naturally, sensing emotions and controlling them are distinct processes, just like our emotions differ from someone else’s. 

This is why emotional intelligence is divided into 5 categories:

  1. Internal motivation, 
  2. Self-regulation, 
  3. Self-awareness, 
  4. Empathy, and 
  5. Social awareness.

It is crucial for anyone interacting with the child to assess their own position regarding these factors. Frequently, we operate out of guilt or sympathy for the child, which limits the effectiveness of our efforts.

Lets face a Moment of Truth ( MOT ) by looking at them briefly:

1. Internal Motivation

Intrinsic motivation refers to the capacity to drive oneself to work with minimal external pressure. Various factors can fuel internal motivation, such as:

  1. Curiosity, the wish to realize our potential, and/or 
  2. The ambition to bring our ideas to fruition. 
  3. If we are strongly motivated from within, external rewards like money or praise may be appealing, but they do not primarily influence our actions. 

This suggests that we have more control over our actions because the drive comes from internal sources, enabling us to CONSIDER AND EXPLORE NEW AND CREATIVE METHODS TO INTERACT WITH THE CHILD.

2.  Self-Regulation

Self-regulation is the ability to remain calm in emotionally trying situations. 

While many factors influence how we feel and may be beyond our control, if we’re highly self-regulated, good at controlling our reactions, i.e WE DO NOT UNNECESSARILY GET TOO SAD / TOO HAPPY / TOO anxious at the level of performance of the child.

We can make clear-headed decisions even if the world is falling apart around us. Also, if we are highly self-regulated, we can easily adapt, because the discomfort that often comes from change won’t make us stumble. . 

For Example, 

If we would want to teach a new skill to the child but keep getting irritated at the pace of learning then, we will make the child lose interest with our approach. Be self-regulated as a firefighter. 

3. Self Awareness

Self-awareness is the ability to evaluate oneself and understand how our behaviour is being perceived by the child. 

If we are self-aware, 

  1. We know how we are feeling, 
  2. How we are acting, and 
  3. How we are coming across /  appear. 

We are likely to have a strong grasp on our own strengths and weaknesses, which means that we know WHERE AND HOW WE” LL BE MOST USEFUL. So, BE A CATALYST FOR POSITIVE ACTION. 

4. Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand how others feel and put ourself “in someone else’s shoes.” While no one can completely know for sure if they’re feeling what someone else is, If we’re highly empathetic, we’re good at intuiting what their feelings might be. 

If we’re highly empathetic, we’re also likely to feel pain when you see others in pain and pleasure when we perceive others’ pleasure, allowing you to connect with others emotionally.

5. Social Awareness

The ability to pick up on social cues and communicate well.

 It requires being quick on our feet in conversations. Be a good and keen observer so that spontaneously we can change or adopt a new approach for maintaining the child’s interest. This will also help to figure out what’s the interest level / involvement level of the child physically and mentally.

Thought-provoking Aspect:

  • We treat others the way our thought process works. 
  • Perceiving the importance of the task at hand and its execution depends on the thoughts we carry at that moment. 
  • Are we “deriving pleasure while we are with the child doing any activity or looking down at it as a task to be accomplished”? This will impact the outcome.

So, first seek to understand ourselves and the WHY  / WHAT DO WE AIM TO ACHIEVE from the task at hand only then, move on to handle the child as an individual with a mind of its own.

Treat Them Normal But... Put Special Efforts